Thursday, July 16, 2009

Well today is one of those days....where i do not feel like myself at all.Today school started off with english ya lesson was ok...Then social studies miss huang never come as she had course so ya free period and this is where my friend took a picture of me using my phone.Ya now the mood is really turning into serious as i am studying .After that was p.e. my yon was pretty disappointed by the class attitude as only 8 person wore pe attire.

Recess ate with jas,jon & jian rong well we ate and then ya as usual jr and jon proof disappear .Used to it nevermind , left jas me and eng kun was there eating so we decided not to pang seh him .(see we so good ,zai hor)

D&T ...................... the recess ended the smile it was there that the whole day flipped .i was doing the acrylic that would help to suppose the handle from like yesterday till today .... today i was rather coming impatient to completing my product for once and for all.I ended up super glueing it for like 3 times it didnt work as the acrylic wasnt flat .it totally racked my product and ended up not sticking together .Dam the hell am i pissed and i had enough of wasting time .... i tried to take out the other side which managed to stick resulting it breaking....... that was the last straw

i totally lost the calmness i had .Impulsiveness took over me ...... i couldnt think right from then on. The bell had rang and the stains had harden and dried up.Looking at the damaged i cause i crumbled into bits .

To the effort that was been wasted for almost 2months of constant staying back gone to waste .

Lit was next and i told mrs bryant i wasnt in the correct mood she understood it but i still tried to pull back my focus to the lesson as i dont wanna fail anything.

Ring ~and the lesson ended . Met choco outside the library planned to go in but diverted to the workshop. I wasnt myself then and i think i lost control of myself all my emotions went wild.

Upon seeing the hideious scar again . i feel angry and furated and the limit finally broke .

Choco realised that i wasnt in the correct mood and she tried calming me down which didnt have much effect .She tried all sorts of things she even tried saying that she would throw something at me .I know my personality well enough . i would give a very slying or fakesmile grin one with the phrase "try me i dare you" .

well she tried conforting me as i keep rebending my holder again and again and again ... which actually made my mood swing worst.As i was lost in my impulsivenes i smacked choco's leg . I didnt really wanted to do it trust me ,it was pretty loud and she didnt react after that i was pretty much suprised well ."Sorry ,Choco" my apologises if you see this.(Thanks for being there)

well after that i chased her away after that fearing that i might injure her due to my lack of control .In a good way i and saving her and in bad way i am chasing her away i think i was trying to save her but in the end i ended up shun her away which did pretty much the same ...

Not long later the Ladies of 4n2 and jasmine came into the workshop ya i know my face seemed pretty down and upset and somewhat scary .Sorry if i might have scared you all or what.

I managed to complete my product and tried to head home asap due to the mood swing but got delayed by mr tay with the lecture of my journal.

After that slacked away in school i dont know why but i was planning to go home ended up there slacking until 6 before going to eat at rp . then went home on com lie down on bed for awhile fell asleep until 8+

i went to check my com to see if i had a conversation ya i had one zoe was talking to me she seemed somewhat worried . ya thanks for concerning